Another chance to meet BaCStage (when it’s safe to do so)

I once saw a very good play called The Perfect Murder. In one scene – spoiler alert – a man is bundled into a chest freezer. Seems like a good idea to me. In fact, the only reason I’m not writing this inside my own chest freezer is that I don’t have a chest freezer. I can only get one hand into the ice box at a time, which makes typing rather tricky.
If you are reading this at some point in the future, and relative to the time at which I wrote it you are of course, I should explain that the UK as a whole is currently in the middle of this month’s record-breaking, once-in-a-generation extreme weather event. Nobody is doing anything if they can possibly avoid it. It’s pushing 40 degrees outside and we’re all indoors with the curtains closed and the fridge door open, with the surreal spectacle of watching a group of numpties denying climate change as part of their pitch to become the UK’s worst prime minister since the last one (keep that streak alive! – US Sports Ed). Who’d even want to leave the house with that going on?
The hot weather won’t last though. Later this week TEMPERATURES WILL PLUMMET BY 20 DEGREES as an icy blast of “normal summer weather” is set to roll in and SEIZE THE COUNTRY IN A VICE-LIKE GRIP. Whatever happened to global warming, eh? (have you been reading the Daily Express? – Health & Safety Ed). When that happens, we will don our winter woolies, tell our mums we’ll be home by tea time and venture out of the house once more.

On Thursday (July 21st) some of us will be meeting up at the Green Man in Colne for a hot toddy and some mulled wine (other beverages will be available). If you’d like to meet us without immediately being put on the spot and asked to read a script, do call in and say hello. On the subject of reading scripts, we had a good read-through of Death by Fatal Murder last Tuesday and we’ll be gathering at the Old Day School next Tuesday (July 26th) for another one. We had some new faces join us last time, which was great to see. We haven’t cast the play yet, so it’s not too late if you do fancy having a go at acting. A summary of the characters can be found here.
If acting is not your thing, you could still get involved. We are after tech team (sound and lighting), prompt, rehearsal assistants, stage crew, front of house assistants, set builders, set dressers, wardrobe manager, props manager and publicity assistants to name but a few roles.
We hope to see you soon!
A footnote for our international reader – you may be of the impression that British people are forever complaining that the weather is too hot / cold / wet / dry / windy / calm. It’s important to understand that everything in Britain is built to operate within a temperature range of 5 to 14 degrees C, with no more than light rain (apart from cricket, obviously) and a gentle breeze. If any weather parameter exceeds those tolerances, everything in Britain breaks. If you’re wondering what is the difference between “breezy” and “windy”, you clearly baint from round these parts, am yer.